Dear Bird in the chimney,

There are many things your could be doing if you weren’t stuck in the chimney, you could be flying, making new friends and generally much much happier… But at the present you are stuck and refusing the assistance that has been offered multiple times.  Dave has made enough room for you to get down, I know it’s true because one of your mates has done it before, unless it is you again, in which case you should know better… And to stay away from the chimney! There is also bread for you at the bottom which we hoped would tempt you to make the journey down, but apparently carbs aren’t your thing…

Here is the thing little bird, I have been told several times to just let you die as you and the rest of your Indian Minor friends are actually a national pest… But I don’t really want that, for two reasons… 1. You sound sad scratching on the pipe and unfortunately I have started to like you and 2. If you die in the pipe… You’ll stink and be much harder to get out.

So please, stop resisting, head towards the light at the bottom and once you are in the fire place we can let you out… And you’ll be free…

Thanks,

Em