Five Minute Friday: Privilege

Ok it’s been a long time since I have done one of these… almost a whole year… but I figured if I want to be deliberate about keeping my blog going with a baby… five minutes was a good place to start… and it comes with no other pressure than the clock… which is good… and necessary.  Anyway, if you want to know more about Five Minute Fridays you can click that link just a few words back, or you can look at the last one I did here.   Ok… 5 minutes here we go.

Privilege

Ok… firstly I don’t think I knew how to spell privilege before this… I am pretty sure I have been doing it wrong… thank goodness for auto correct.

Privilege is a word that has been getting a lot more air time than ever before… and I think it is one that I have been thinking a lot more, about my own privilege, the things I get to do just because of the circumstances I was born into… and I often find it overwhelming.  But that’s not the kind of privilege I really want to talk about… because as I sit here typing this my little boy is asleep next to me and he has me thinking about what a privilege it is to be his mum.

Privilege can be defined as “a right, immunity, or benefit enjoyed only by a person beyond the advantages of most”…. It’s a good thing, something enjoyable beyond the advantages of anyone else but sometimes I lose the enjoyment part because being his mum is also a huge responsibility.  I get to help shape this little man as he grows, teach him, guide him and help him.  There is a verse in Proverbs (Proverbs 22:6) that says “Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” and that’s what I am aiming for… There are so many things that I would like for him, things that I hope to teach him, things I hope to show him and things I hope to watch him achieve… and in that sometimes I feel overwhelmed… because I want to do a good job, and lead him in the ‘right’ way.  But when I get caught up in the responsibility I lose sight of the incredible privilege it is… the fact that while trying to lead him in the way of the Lord, I also get to know him probably better than anyone else on earth ever will… I am his person… and while my role might change as he grows… it can’t be taken away, I am always going to be his mum and that, right there is the privilege.  I get to share in his joys, his sorrows, his challenges and his achievements.  His victories are my victories.  At least for the next little bit we will do it all together… and that is an amazing thought… that is privilege.

 

What happens once you get to Adulthood?

Today I have found myself thinking about my future and what my life might look like over the next 12 months and beyond… it’s a question that for as long as I can remember, I have always had an answer to… but right now I don’t…

To be honest, my life has run a pretty standard course in terms of life stages… but I think I might be in a gap… and the control freak in me is not sure how to do a long stage that doesn’t have a whole heap of direction…

Let me explain… When I was in primary school, the next step was high school, from there I went to uni, when I finished uni I got a job… then next on the list was moving out of home, then getting married, then traveling and then having a baby… which brings me to now… I think the next logical step in my life plan is retirement… which as much as I would love to tick of right now… would be a fairly miserable way to live, given my working carrier has not been that extensive and my ‘nest egg’ is pretty small…

I am guessing that for the next little bit Isaac’s goals will become my own… I will help him move through his stages of life… but right now, looking at just my life… I have hit a big chapter… where I can say I have reached it… but it will be a long time before it is complete.

It’s such a strange feeling… not really know where to aim, not knowing what I need to do, or how I will know when this bit is done… usually I would find a situation such as this stressful and unnerving, but I am hopeful… this ‘adulthood with kids’ stage will be long and I am sure as I start to journey through it, it will have its own goals, but it is also a blank canvas. Previously I have always been pushing myself forward… willing myself to be older and to tick all the boxes, so I had never stopped to think about what this bit would look like, what I would do, who I would be… I was just in a rush to get here (which in hindsight seems silly, because the chapters that came before were just as important and also very fun).  Yet, despite my lack of planning… here we are, with so much ahead… and it’s exciting.

Maybe I’m the only one that looks at parenthood and thinks like this… I am sure I am not… but over the past 5 months I haven’t had a heap of time to plan and dream for what it might look like, and I am sure once Dave goes back to work later this week, I will be totally focused on getting through one day at a time… but right now… in this moment, where my head is above water and I have the energy to swim… it’s exciting to dream about my ‘mum’ life and all that it will bring.